I dig chicks

Growing up, most of my friends were guys. I had a few female friends, most notably when I lived in Bastrop in my early teens, but when I reached 15 or so I started to find it very difficult to relate to the girls around me. This continued until a few years ago. I have a few theories as to why that is, but what it comes down to is that I was kind of intentionally closing myself off.  For a long time I just thought I couldn't get a long with women. So many were catty, or talked exclusively about things I found boring. While I wore makeup and painted my nails, I didn't have money for clothes or shoes, so bonding over that stuff was out. I've come to realize though that it was a matter of me not giving them a chance. Estranged from my mother and lacking a consistent female role model (though my aunt filled the role wonderfully when she was able to) I was wary and awkward. I just didn't relate.

Thankfully this has changed over the past few years, partially due to my internal attitudes shifting, but also because I'm honored to know some of the raddest women on the planet. I'm not going to say that I never have days where I feel like a bit of an outsider, but I am honored to be part of such a great group. The women I know are as varied and unique as you can imagine, but at the core there are similar struggles and experiences. As a result, the last few years have done more to turn me into a feminist than my whole lifetime leading up to them. I think one of the healthiest things you can do for your emotional state is surround yourself with a group of strong women. Whenever I start to internalize the message that I'm not attractive enough, or smart enough, or good enough in any other way I just look at my girlfriends - the tall and short ones, the skinny and curvy ones, the quiet and loud ones, the A cups to F cups - and think about how they're all beautiful and how I would never judge them harshly - which means they aren't judging me either and fuck anyone else that does. It's a good reality check sometimes. Mostly though, they're just a shit ton of fun. I know I'm being a bit sappy, but I just got back from a wonderful beach house weekend for my friend Liz's bachelorette party and I'm feeling really grateful.